Reading group questions for I Can't Believe She Did That

1. Do you consider yourself an ambitious person? Why or why not? Is being ambitious a positive quality?

2. Do you consider yourself a competitive person? Why or why not? Is being competitive a positive quality?

3. Have you experienced competition with another woman in the workplace? Do you wish things had played out differently? If so, how?

4. Have you experienced conflict with another woman in the workplace? Do you wish things had played out differently? If so, how?

5. Have you ever had a problem with a female colleague you couldn’t resolve to your satisfaction? What happened?

6. Have you ever behaved towards a female colleague in a way that you weren’t proud of or satisfied with? Why do you think this happened?

7. Have you ever had a female boss? How would you describe your relationship? How did you deal with conflicts?

8. Have you ever been a boss? How would you describe your relationships to your female employees? How did you deal with conflicts?

9. Have you had any female mentors or role models in the workplace? What was the relationship like? Were there any problems?

10. Have you ever experienced racism or discrimination from another woman in the workplace?

11. Did you participate in competitive sports or games with other girls growing up? Do you do so now? How does what you learned on the “playing field” transfer to the workplace, if at all?

12. While growing up, what messages did you absorb about competition and conflict with other girls or women? How do you think this transfers to the workplace, if at all?

13. How much of a responsibility do you think women have to support other women professionally? Why or why not? How often do you think this occurs?

14. What do you consider the main cause of problems among women in the workplace? What, if anything, can we do about it?

Additional Questions:

1. After reading I Can’t Believe She Did That, what do you think are the most important steps women can begin taking to work together more productively? Have each person come up with one thing they can begin to do as an individual.

2. Do you think conflict and competition among women on the job is a bad thing? Why or why not? What is the difference between healthy and unhealthy competition?

3. How do women’s professional relationships differ from our personal relationships with one another?

4. Are you dealing with any difficult situations among your female colleagues right now? What steps could you begin taking to improve the situation?

5. What fears or doubts do you have about openly addressing problems with your female colleagues?

6. Why is it important that women start to discuss and address the problems in our professional relationships? What will happen if we don’t?